WHO ARE WE REALLY?

A view of being human

What does it mean to be a human being? Who are we really?

My sense of all of these polarities occurring at once in the world is that we are being called to grow in a profound way in our understanding and realization of being human in relationship with all that is. What I find myself most focused upon these days are these questions: As human beings, who are we really? What are the qualities which make us human? What do we know about being human and what do we not know? What role do human beings have in relationship with all other life? Why did the source of all bring forth human beings into existence at all?

There are so many ways to consider these questions. Throughout time, religion and spirituality have always been fundamental ways that we have considered these questions.

At this stage of human unfolding, there appears to be two major views humanity at play which are deeply polarized.

The two views of humanity are caught in a quest for survival, competition for resources, to be on top economically and through gathering together with others to exercise power and control over others. This includes us versus them; the incessant need to win at all costs, an all-encompassing need to be right and never wrong, an unwillingness to compromise, listen or learn from other viewpoints, fighting for one’s personal happiness only—even if this happiness comes at a very large price, including the lives of other beings. This view usually includes a rigidified heart and mind, masquerading as superiority and a willingness to create chaos and destruction to make the world over in our image of how it should be. This includes making God or Spirit or whatever name you wish—over in this judgmental image of right vs wrong for humanity. This view also includes a deep unwillingness to change or transform and a repulsion for what is considered to be weakness, which is vulnerability and an open heart or caring for other beings. This view of humanity is based on individualism pretending to be individuation. When we become pure reaction, there is no individuation. We are actually blindly following those who are telling us how things should be and whom we are placing our faith in to save us. Even though we are playing these out in significant ways everywhere we look, there is yet another view that is seeking to emerge which is more unknown than known.

This view of humanity is based on awakening into greater kinship and love for all life, where everyone is included and valued, and no one is excluded. This is not based on a personal only view where we include only those we agree with and exclusion of those people we disagree with. It is based on a willingness to see one’s own rigidities and judgements and to engage in the hard work of awakening transformation and healing right here in this very challenging place, instead of only trying to escape or become lost in one’s own stories about us vs them. Arising from this view is a depth of continually opening one’s heart and mind to being humane, which is characterized by tenderness, benevolence, compassion, gentleness and empathy for people, animals and the earth, especially for the suffering or distressed. To truly engage with this point of view is to be willing to open to ambiguity, which is usually described as the quality of being open to multiple interpretations or understandings in relationship. Fundamentally this view is aligned with true individuation, which actually has many levels of wisdom, understanding, growth and realization.

Letting go is a lesson all mystics teach us. Every human being today is being called to let go: to let go of certainty, let go of needing to be right, let go of judging and condemning others, let go of our perceptions of our own lives and the lives of others, let go of being sure we know the right path here and now or the right way(s) forward. It is only in letting go that we can open ourselves to the often invisible or semi-visible wisdom and love that is truly available to us in this moment. As Stephen Hawking said: “The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge.” When we believe our thoughts to be absolutely true or a completely reliable way of perceiving and relating to what is occurring now, we are taking a stand or making an announcement that we have closed up our heart and mind and are unwilling to let go and learn more than we already believe to be true. This usually arises from being entangled in our historical wounding and historical ways of feeling masterful. At least for that moment, this makes us unteachable.

Again, ambiguity is needed. This means we are called to begin to notice ‘who’ it is who is present in the moment. There are usually multiple aspects of our being—or multiple interpretations of what is occurring—which are present at the same time. We may have an idea of what to do in any moment and simultaneously we don’t know if this is the most beneficial course of action. We may be open to where we are right now and be closed off to specific thoughts and feelings. We may be filled with love and compassion for life and judgmental towards certain others. Another important one is our overall ambiguous relationship with the known and unknown, including our views of safety.

When we allow in ambiguity and are honest about these multiple interpretations occurring within us—we are actually more open to being taught—in even the most closed places within us. In a certain sense, it is easy to be taught when we are open to particular points of view, for then being taught is simply a confirmation of the opinions and ideas we already have. We’re not actually being taught anything new. As William James said, “A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.” To be willing to learn from our closedness and our openness is the beginning of true wisdom.

In the face of the chaos in the world, I often find myself engaging with these two particular opposites: helplessness, aka powerlessness and power of choice. It is only in holding these two vividly together in my mind, heart and body that I find the capacity—including new depths of stillness and silence—to drop to a level of heretofore unknown love-wisdom and choice. The choices which arise from this place are beyond my historical ideas and usually surprise me. I may write, make a phone call, engage in a practice, contact someone, take any number of actions. The hallmark of these choices or actions are that I know this is the action I need to take now, and I don’t feel a need to justify the action as being right or wrong. Nor am I attached to a particular outcome from my taking this action. It’s an action which arises out of love for all humanity and all life, including my own. I know that I am participating as an aspect of reality and through my actions committing to be a loving healing presence in life. I pray and ask continually to be taught and to do what is mine to do.

This isn’t an easy path. I often find myself dropping into deep sorrow for all of the suffering I feel personally and in the world. Since this is what I honestly feel, I know this too has a place in the wholeness of reality. My vulnerable heart is included. I will cry and cry and as I do, say quietly out loud, I know the divine is present here in this place. Please teach me. Please teach me. Please teach me. I don’t know how to be here, and I don’t know the most beneficial action I can take at this time. As I sit there, something changes or reveals itself to me. It’s different each time and just as importantly, it’s not a blueprint or a revelation of everything I need to do. It is a revelation for now.

Other times, I find myself filled with self-righteousness about what others are doing. I admit that sometimes I just react with great intensity. This, too, is honest and that is vitally important. Honesty is the place where God meets me, or God can find me. Again, it’s not an easy path and the healing then is to acknowledge this, not judge myself and recognize that there is wisdom in this too. I sit and express all of where I am honestly in prayer. Then I pause and sit in silence and stillness and ask to be taught, to be shown the ways I have hardened and rigidified and to be shown the right action to take now.

This again unfolds in a wide variety of ways, sometimes pointing to a new depth of transformation within me that is needed and/or a specific action to take out in the world. My favorite quote from Viktor Frankl continually inspires me in this, “Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space lies our freedom and power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our happiness.” One of the most powerful actions we can take is to give ourselves this space to be honest and to be taught and to know in a new way.

Mechtild of Magdeburg said, “From the very beginning, God loved us.” We were loved from the beginning and are loved deeply and profoundly now. We were fashioned nobly and made in the image of infinite love. God or the Nameless One is not a goal but is the presence right Now continually holding us and offering us the wisdom we need moment by moment. If we are present to both to our helplessness and powerlessness and the power to choose, we also then have the capacity to focus on what we can change in the moment and to not become obsessed or lost in reactivity and projection into the future.

Carl Jung often spoke of what occurs when we are in a situation where there is no way out. He called this the classical beginning of true individuation. Another way he framed it is that this is where/when the true authentic Self, whom we do not yet know, appears. We have to let go of who we thought we were and who we thought we had to be at times, to open to a new level of selfhood and a new level of wisdom.

Individuation is not solely about individual people; it is also about the collective. Levels of individuation are a descent into the inner invisible realms, and they become increasingly more inclusive as we descend. They call for us to continually be open to change and increasing awareness of features or aspects of being which are calling to be noticed and included. We are called to take these new infinite possibilities of being human into our identity and sense of being human and to make them viable and accessible in a real way in ourselves, our lives and in the world of relationship. Then, our inner world unites with the outer world as one wholeness or singularity.

A key quality of individuation is the end is embedded in the beginning. We are incomplete and need to heal and transform precisely because we are complete, made in the image of love in relationship and union. Just as a seed contains ALL of the information needed to grow into a tree, the source of our being within us and all around us, contains all of the knowledge and wisdom of what is needed to grow into being human.

Consciously, we do not even begin to know the wholeness of what it is to be human. We are children playing on the playground of life, sometimes playing nicely, other times destroying and wiping out villages and life. And yet, the wisdom of the source of our being is within us and is available to us, if/when we are willing to receive it and to truly grow into our humanity.

Are we willing to listen and to be taught what it really means to exist as human beings?